Im allergic to bee stings. They cause me to, uh, die. Look out, Itchy! He’s Irish! A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice. Hi. I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self-help tapes as “Smoke Yourself Thin” and “Get Some Confidence, Stupid!” Oh, a *sarcasm* [...]
I prefer a vehicle that doesn’t hurt Mother Earth. It’s a go-cart, powered by my own sense of self-satisfaction. How could you?! Haven’t you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police [...]
Oh, so they have Internet on computers now! I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn. You don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way. Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the [...]
I didn’t get rich by signing checks. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals…except the weasel. Your questions have become more redundant and annoying than the last three “Highlander” movies. Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the bone. Please do not [...]
Ah, yes! John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a chord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree. You’re going back for the Countess, aren’t you? I meant ‘physically’. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or [...]
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